No Touch Monkey!

NC-17 This comic contains nudity, cartoon sex, and historical factoids which might be considered blasphemous to certain religions. If such things disturb you, you probably shouldn't watch this.



I've posted this link every year since I started NTM, but much to my disappointment the e-sheep domain is no longer active.

Luckily for us though The Interweb Remembers Everything, so sit down boys and girls and learn the real meaning of Christmas.

Labels: Comics, Story Telling, Taboo, Worth your time

See Dick & Jane. See Dick find the idol. See the idol, the idol loves jam. And so it goes:



via FilmDrunk.com

Labels: Worth your time

shawn barber Copyright 2008

Holy Cow! Are these works stellar! They just take my breath away. Just...wow.

Labels: Art, NSFW, tattooed chicks, Worth your time

The Nerd/Geek Bloggosphere is creaming in it's collective jeans for the new iphone G3. Unfortunately it's spilling over into nearly every blog on my reader: "Look the new white box! The very first owner! The lines! How to unwrap and open your iphone." Sure it's cool, but it's driving me batty.

I think everyone needs to calm the fuck down and watch: The Story of Stuff



viaThe Beautiful Kind - Ramblings of an Expert Slut and Nympho Sex Goddess

Labels: Worth your time

All men are not created equal. It is the purpose of the Government to make them so.

Several months ago I heard about this movie on some forum, and I was able to download it, sitting on it until I had a chance to watch it. The society portrayed here is similar to the one in Sirens of Titan in that all physical and mental inequalities are leveled through the use of handicapping (athletes are weighted down, intelligent people crippled with mind numbing headbands). Harrison is a young man too smart for his band who is taken into the secret government to help run things.

The movie, while neither political Left or Right is a great Dystopian satire about good intentions gone bad and the moral ambiguity of doing the right thing. This movie reminds me blend of both Network and Idiocracy. I really enjoyed it, and think that if you like reading NTM and agree with some of the things I write, then you should probably watch this movie.

Watch the entire movie starring Sean Astin:


You can read the short story here:"Harrison Bergeron" by Kurt Vonnegut

Labels: Multiple Media, Worth your time

By the Mountain Goats by way of Alessandra by way of Lime n Violet Knitting Podcast



File under-Blogging by Proxy

Labels: Worth your time

I'm pretty sure this will do it. It did me.

It's the Blind Boys of Alabama doing Stevie Wonder's Higher Ground

Labels: Worth your time

Last night Alessandra and I watched The History of the Joke on the History Channel.

It was great. I had already knew what made good comedy, but it was nice to hear a bunch of comics tell it in their own words. If you have any interest in the what makes funny, you should set your DVRs to record this show.

Today is the 14 anniversary of the death of Bill Hicks.

Go back to bed America. Your Government is in control. Here's American Gladiators. Watch this...shut up. Go back to bed America

Watch this documentary or buy his albums. Find the oddity that occurs with this clip. Report back to me.

Labels: Worth your time

I had once gotten into a wicked fight with a girlfriend about humans behavior and our desire to constantly alter our brains and perceptions.

I am under the belief that we enjoy the fuck out of rearranging our perceptions.
Children do it all the time. That's what I think meditation is for. As is going on thrill rides which led to a fight about whether or not monks would enjoy riding roller coasters.




I was pro-coaster monk, she was anti.

I can't help but notice the argument memories I still hold inside are the ones I lost even though I knew I was right. 15 years later the proof is in the photograph, so I can finally let this one go.

I discovered a "new way" to really pleasantly mess with your mind just the other night. If you pay attention to how your eyes move when you run your inner monologue Eye Accessing Cues, try and move them the opposite direction. For example I was trying to picture how I drew something and my eyes shifted to my upper right. I deliberately shifted them to the left middle and I experienced what could best be described as a brain freeze, non verbal fragmentation of weird indescribable lightning images. I'm hoping to somehow provoke myself into Synethesia.

Labels: The Cap'n, Whoa, Worth your time

Is there an easier, squishy, smelly, adorable, "Thank God They're Not Mine," target than babies? Retards? Yeah, but that's just not nice.

Click Pic for more funny.

Labels: Worth your time

In the 46th episode of Out There Radio, Raymond and Joe discuss the life and work of comedians Lenny Bruce and Bill Hicks, and their roles as 'social critics and secular moralists.' There are a *lot* of clips in this episode, so this is a great episode for both fans and newcomers to the work of these two comedy geniuses. Austin Gandy also returns for an Out There News segment which you won't want to miss. Originally released 7/3/2007.

via-Disinfo.com

Can you ever go wrong with Lenny Bruce and Bill Hicks? I think not.

Labels: Worth your time

Cruising around the Tubes as often as I do, I see a lot of images grabbed and reused over and over. So it was with great pleasure that I stumbled across some great images here. I think the site is Polish, and there are a few Nazi pictures, almost all of these images are striking in their composition.

Since there are no explanations, or context for the photos. I decided to make up a couple of my own.


As Irma gazed lovingly into Prince X-9's light sensors she felt her love it grow to encompass the world. Would a kiss transform it into flesh and blood? Dare she try? What if she failed? Could she handle it, more so, what if she succeeded? What would her life become? Questions became more questions. Her brain was aflame!

"Beep Blorp Boop." thought X-9.



Hitler's deployment of the deadly Donkey Bomb came too late to turn the tide of WWII. Unbeknownst to him, the donkeys really enjoyed their Nazi Powered Horsey Rides.

You know...the donkey may not have the physiology for it, but I swear he/she looks happy.

Labels: Worth your time

If you come to NTM, chances are you like to read, and will most likely get some sort of gift certificate for books in the next few days. If you do, I suggest you that purchase, as quickly as you can




Rumo: And His Miraculous Adventures by Walter Moers.

I can't remember when I've fallen in love so quickly with a book before. I happened across it in the Fiction/Lit section at Borders (as opposed to SF/Fantasy where I normally go and shrug off 99% of the fare.)

Here is how the reviewers decribe it: "An over stuffed confection...Cross Lord of the Rings with Yellow Submarine, throw in dashes of Monty Python, Douglas Adams, Shrek and The Princess Bride, season with more serious fare such as The Tin Drum and The Odyssey." and "Equal Parts Rowling, Adams and Shel Siverstein...a work of monumental silliness."

I mean, can you really go wrong with that sort of description? How about tossing in some Dr. Seuss?

But what is it about? It's about Rumo and his adventures. Think Dog Conan meets Wicked (the book not the play).

It's world building at it's finest. I can't talk it up enough and I'm only on page 137 of 687 (it's a $16 trade paperback so it's well worth it's price).

Labels: books, Gosh_Wow, Worth your time

We went to seeBodyworlds 3 Friday Night. It was incredibly cool. Normally I suffer from Thanophobia, several times a year waking up screaming as my own mortality smacks me in the face, but I still found the exhibit really neat.

I brought a sketchbook and did gesture drawings of the larger figures while Alessandra listened to the audio tour. When you walk in, they display builds you up to the with small things like skulls and bones etc. A 14 year old girl was there with her family, she kept asking, "Is that real? Is that real?" It kind of got on my nerves until I told her, "It's ALL real. Everything but the eyes." And that shut her up. You think people would know that going in.

I'm currently nursing a cold and reading World War Z, about the great Zombie War. I thought it would be campy, I was really surprised to be drawn into the story.

Blah blah blah, I just want to post a link to Bodyworlds.

Labels: Worth your time

Hi Mark,

thanks for posting my "icon-language" website..

So - maybe you are also interested in my new as-if-book: www.icon-message.com

It's a language with amimated icons, small enough to fit into the MSN Messenger.

The good news: This Messenger it's also possible to type woman+ and get the icon, to type happy+ and get the icon ... and so on.

The bad news: Not a single mobile, or e-mail client has (as far as I know) similar features.


Best regards
Jochen

As a matter of fact...I am indeed interested. Thanks for contacting me Jochen.

Labels: i, Visual Thinking, Worth your time

Orenthal James (was a mighty bad man)
Listen

Orenthal James was a mighty bad man
He killed two people last night
Chopped off their heads in West L. A.
Musta been a mighty sharp knife poor boy!
Musta been a mighty sharp knife

One was his X-wife, the other one her lover
Orenthal was a very jealous man
He hid in the bushes and began to mutter
If I can't have her nobody else can

He flew to Chicago, two cuts on his hand
Two bodies discovered too fast
his outa town alibi gone up in smoke
Now we find out 'bout his wife beatin' past
find out about his wife beatin' past

They threw him in jail, they brought him to trial
Orenthal hired million dollar turkeys
Told so many lies, I almost went blind
If he didn't ddo it who did? Poor Boy!
If he didn't do it who did?

Orenthal had the motive and opportunity too
He planned it all and tried to escape
Wrote a suicide note but wasn't man enough
To speak the truth and seal his fate. Poor Boy!
There was blood in the car and blood on his clothes
Thou they never did find that knife
He smiled for the cameras and bought him some justice
And got away with killin' his wife

When the foreman returned and said not guilty
I couldn't believe my ears
Orenthal James is a mighty bad man
Ought be in jail for 400 years
Servin' tme for 400 years

Orenthal James killed his bimbo X-wife
The mama of his children, too
Been in Hollywood so long
He starts to believe the big lie
Don't let it happen to you

Orenthal James is a very bad man
Killed two people last night
Chopped off their heads in West L. A.
Musta been a mighty sharp knife, Poor Boy!
Musta been a mighty sharp knife.

Karma is a bitch.

Labels: Insanity, Worth your time

It's that time a year again where I solicit strangers and friends alike to donate to my MS Bike Ride: Donate Here



This year, the team of Cap'n Marrrrk and the Scurvy Dogs consist of Cap'n Marrrrk and 1 Scurvy Dog (my friend Sappo). Without a $5k donation from Hooters this year, it will be more difficult to raise the required 500 bucks. So could you please kick in some green?

Thanks!

Labels: Worth your time

I was down at the movie theater watching Caveman repeatedly.

Luckily for me I own it on DVD. You should add it to your Netflix queue. Ringo Starr plays Atook who is driven out of his tribe and must make his way in a cruel, savage land, while discovering and inventing a lot of important shit along the way.



Music is discovered.



Blind Caveman Hilarity

Labels: Ahahahahaha, Newwwww Wave, Worth your time

After a trip to the comics section of my local library, I finally got around to reading Bone after seeing it referenced again and again in Scott McCloud's comics interpretation books.

Deeeeelightful! I have read the entire series in about a week found it charming, amusing, heartfelt, hugely comical and adventurous. I can't even imagine following these as they came out for 10 years. I would have lost my mind.

What is Bone about? Three cousins (Fone Bone, Smiley Bone and Phonincible "Phoney" Bone) are run out of Boneville and wind up in a nice green valley filled with A Cow Racing Old Lady, Stupid, Stupid Rat Creatures, an easily swayed mob, and a copy of Moby Dick.

If you enjoy any of the above adjectives as well as having a penchant for visual storytelling (ok, ok...comics) then I suggest you trot on down to the local library and get started on Volume 1 today. 5 out of 5 Arrrr!s


Black Snake Moan & Grandma's Boy

I watched both of these movies last weekend. I'm going to have to call it as Black Snake Meh, as it was kind of dull. Maybe I was just in a bad mood. It wasn't bad, but it wasn't great either just kind of there. I will say that it was well acted. I give it 2.5 Arrr!s out of 5.

I didn't know that Grandma's Boy was produced by Adam Sandler, or I probably wouldn't have watched it. Someone loaned it to me and said I would find it funny.

The movie is about a 36 year old, dope smoking video game tester forced to move in with his Grandma after he's evicted from his apartment.

It was indeed a funny movie, and great to waste your brain on with very, very mild "dramatic" conflict and an almost nonexistent foil.

Think of it as a poor man's mix of Office Space and 40 Year Old Virgin.

I give this one 2.5 Arrrr!s but recommend it over Black Snake Moan...if you like nerd, doper humor...which very much to my surprise I do.

Labels: Worth your time

I was looking around for a mind mapping application for a collaborative project that is trying to get off the ground and I found Mindomo with which people can post public maps they have constructed. Thanks to Lady Gray who took the time to lay out some resources. Just roll over the little globes for pop-up links.

Labels: Worth your time

Some of the greatest people in history have educated themselves to a large degree using a process known as autodidacticism. This is something that's more easily undertaken these days with the great wealth of online tools available to anyone.

Whether you've gone to college or not, you can learn just about anything these days on your own. Want to learn about the classics? Carpentry and home maintenance? Philosophy or cooking? Chess or computer programming? It's all online, and with a little bit of excitement, you can motivate yourself to learn a subject in a growing number of ways.

Why self-education? Well, besides the obvious reasons of wanting to improve yourself, prepare yourself for success, and just learn as much as you can, self-education offers a few extra benefits: you can learn at your own pace, and in your own way. You can follow your passions, and learn about things that excite you. There's no price for failure, but there's every reward for success.

How do you go about becoming an autodidact? The answer is simple: any way you want. I would suggest you set aside just a little time each day to learn a specific subject, but that really depends on your learning style. Some people learn all in one great rush: they'll stay up late hours for a few days in a row, consuming everything they possibly can about a subject. Others are overwhelmed by an approach like that, and would rather learn a little each day.
More

via - Dumb Little Man

Labels: Gosh_Wow, Worth your time

happened Sunday Night. Over the past few weeks I've been growing my visual thinking perception, and I've been doing some layman's research by getting into articles from Visible Language, the journal of the Institute of Design from Illinois Institute of Technology, (I have a Proquest access to thousands of pdf journals, but that's another story). As a result, when the incident occurred I visualized it pretty much like this. Let me know if I'm able to get the point across. The first person to tell me what occurred Sunday night wins a prize.

The idea here is that the story should be understandable for illiterate (but not unintelligent), people of all nationalities. And I decided to use the generic AIGA Symbols for aesthetic purposes as I learn to draw, so the piece looks kind of primitive. Sorry about that.

Anyway, you'll need Adobe Acrobat or other pdf reader to view it. You are encouraged to zoom. Click the picture to begin download.

Labels: Worth your time, WTF

Forget Jimi At Monteray, or Dylan going electric. The Greatest Moment in Rock History occured yesterday when Spinal Tap played Live Earth.

Labels: Worth your time

"Why most suicide bombers are Muslim, beautiful people have more daughters, humans are naturally polygamous, sexual harassment isn't sexist, and blonds are more attractive."

It's a very interesting article that really shows hows the foundations of our society are based on sex, marriage, procreation etc. It's nice to look under the hood and be reminded of our current well-dressed, storytelling apehood.

via: Psychology Today

Labels: Worth your time

So I think I found a place that I'd like to work. It's a company called XPLANE. It appears have the qualities I'm looking for in a company, including a mental component that really appeals to me. I used my extra time in the past week digging through one of their .pdf work samples, relearning Flash and rearranging dozens of free-floating vector objects to create an animation that I hope I get to show someone at the company. I had a phone interview a couple of weeks ago. I'll find out next Friday if I made it to the next round where I may get the opportunity, and if I don't make it, I'll send it in to HR as a last ditch effort to get the gig.

The Better Flash Movie (click image)



The lower resolution, but sharable YouTube

Labels: The Cap'n, work, Worth your time

Ultimately, this film will most likely piss off any American who watches it. Those who are dead-set on hating everything Michael Moore releases will be infuriated by his trademark style of re-arranging of events to fit his position.sicko.jpg There are going to be those who will attempt to stop the distribution of the film because of his trip to Cuba, where he succeeds in providing an entourage of people in dire need of health care with access to Cuban doctors. Others will find his pointed statements about Hillary Clinton’s acceptance of funds from the medical lobbyists to be an assault on a beloved Democratic icon. No matter where you fall on the political spectrum though, it would be hard to ignore the truth at the heart of this film, that truth being there is something decidedly fucked up about the health care industry in this country. While this film proposes no solutions, it does most assuredly provide a point of entry into a debate that will not go away until people stop making money at the expense of the health of others.

Dowload it Here


Note: You will need to download a bittorrent client: Azureus:Java BitTorrent Client - Download to watch it, but you should do it today.

Labels: The Man, Worth your time, WTF

Embedding not allowed, clicky title.

Labels: Newwwww Wave, Worth your time

In 2000 I was awfully busy what with y2k coming up, and spending a lot of time at Disinfo, so I missed out on the release of The Langley Schools Music Project: "INNOCENCE AND DESPAIR"

"The Langley Schools Music Project is a 60-voice chorus of rural school children from western Canada, untrained but captivated by melodic magic, singing tunes by the Beach Boys, Paul McCartney, David Bowie, The Bay City Rollers, and others. The students accompany themselves with the shimmering gamelan chimes of Orff percussion, and elemental rock trimmings arranged by their itinerant music teacher, Hans.Fenger.

These 1976-77 recordings, captured on a 2-track tape deck in a school gymnasium, weren't staged to achieve money or fame, to sell albums or land a record contract. These kids played music because they loved it. Innocent, flawed and bittersweet, guided by Fenger's unsuspecting genius, these recordings deserve to be heard and preserved. They brim with charm and youthful élan, sparked by flashes of lo-fi Spectorian majesty and Pet Sounds subtlety. Call it folk art, outsider, or campfire rock -- the labels don't matter. These are gorgeous, heavenly artifacts. Period.

These recordings were originally contained on two 12" LPs, pressed exclusively for the students, their classmates, teachers, and parents. They were never intended for exposure outside the provincial Langley region."

You can hear it in it's entirety on Rhapsody

And how did I hear about this? Internet Radio of course.

Save Internet Radio!

Labels: Worth your time

Cool! Kooks-R-Us.

I think the best way to approach these videos is with skepticism with the definition of suspended judgment, and to try to tease the truth out of the noise.

Note the URL: Valis

Labels: Culture Wars, HyperMedia, Worth your time

Muppets Tonight was a stellar show. Too bad ABC didn't really support it.

Labels: Worth your time

Everything you see is fake:



Maplewood Drug Bust
Watch for the "evidence"


-thanks Thom

Labels: Worth your time

by Kurt Vonnegut
Extract from chapter 33:-

'As I said in my speech': I told him, 'your new middle name would consist of a noun, the name of a flower or fruit or nut or vegetable or legume, or a bird or a reptile or a fish, or a mollusk, or a gem or a mineral or a chemical element -- connected by a hyphen to a number between one and twenty.' I asked him what his name was at the present time.

'Elmer Glenville Grasso,' he said.

'Well,' I said, 'you might become Elmer Uranium-3 Grasso, say. Everybody with Uranium as a part of their middle name would be your cousin.'

'That brings me back to my first question,' he said, 'What if I get some artificial relative I absolutely can't stand?'

* * *

'What is so novel about a person's having a relative he can't stand?' I asked him. 'Wouldn't you say that sort of thing has been going on now for perhaps a million years, Mr Grasso?'

via Exploding Aardvark

In other news...I went to a wedding last night where the Groom is an Entomologist at the Zoo, so they had chocolate covered insect treats on the tables (my idea). So I ate a couple. They were tasted just like dried Soba noodles dipped in chocolate. I'm glad they weren't gooey.

And I just got back from a Couple's Baby Shower. Holy Jeez! Only the Poker I played with the other husbands kept me from being totally emasculated.

Labels: Worth your time

On our way out to see "Chicago-The Musical" at the Fox Theater tonight, our local community radio station was doing a show on American Masters. Tonights episode was Tom Lehrer. I'd never heard of him, and I'm too damn lazy to post a link to anything other than an amusing Flash movie set to one of his songs Poisoning Pigeons in the Park, but for me, this definitely deserves a follow up.

Labels: Ahahahahaha, Worth your time

It must be deflating when your best isn't good enough...

Just ask Zoidberg

Labels: Ahahahahaha, Hot Cha Cha Cha Cha, Worth your time

Really, just fantatsic. If it were mine, the audio would be filled with me laughing maniacally.

Labels: Ahahahahaha, Worth your time