Inspiration, move me brightly...

A few days ago I got a Grateful Dead song in my head and decided it was time to start learning Dead tunes on the guitar. So I went to The Big Chain Store and bought the Grateful Dead Songbook.

I plunk around with some songs trying to get a feel for them and playing very slowly because they are in Keys that are different from C which I am used to playing. And there are weird triple notes in the score that I don't know how to play.

But I continue on because I feel the music in me and I finally get to the Terrapin Station part of the song Terrapin Station where I discover it's easy to play.

Inspiration, move me brightly. light the song with sense and color;
Hold away despair, more than this I will not ask.
Faced with mysteries dark and vast, statements just seem vain at last.
Some rise, some fall, some climb, to get to terrapin.

Counting stars by candlelight, all are dim but one is bright;
The spiral light of venus, rising first and shining best,
On, from the northwest corner, of a brand new crescent moon,
While crickets and cicadas sing, a rare and different tune,
Terrapin station.

There I am playing a song I recognize and love goosebumps are raised on my arms, the hair on my neck is standing up and my eyes are watering. It's happening now as I write this, and I am so filled with emotion that I'm about to burst into full-cry (but I don't). This is the reason I signed on to play guitar, and it's glorious!

I am hoping that Alessandra, who is sitting near by watching tv, will shift her attention due to the power of the music, but alas it doesn't and she continues to watch the tube. She not only misses the whole thing, but also (when badgered by me) fails to get the gist of the replay. I am aghast and crushed because while she had been to some Dead shows with me, never really listened to them. And the breadth of my disappointment is as great as my recent high. I go to sleep is a bad, bad mood.

Even as I am hurt, I realize that it is my fault, my thoughts of reality crashing with hers, but that doesn't lessen the pain. For a brief shining moment, I thought the music would be enough to turn off the tv trance, and she would recognize the song, and praise me for how good I could relatively play it.

But that's how it goes. The world doesn't stop turning in either situation. I guess, I'll just keep on playing what I want to play, and let it take me to where it takes me and let the rest of the world go hang. "Some rise, some fall, some climb....to get to Terrapin."