Speaking of Penii

First, because I find it almost impossible to avoid making inappropriate Monty Python references, The Penis Song

Isn't it awfully nice to have a penis.
Isn't it frightfully good to have a dong.
It's swell to have a stiffy,
It's divine to own a dick.
From the tiniest little tadger,
To the world's biggest prick.
So three cheers for your willy or John Thomas.
Hooray for your one-eyed trouser snake.
Your piece-of-pork,
Your wife's best friend,
Your Percy or your cock.
You can wrap it up in ribbons,
You can slip it in your sock.
But don't take it out in public
Or they will stick you in the dock,
And you won't come back.

You love your penis. You want to keep it safe from predators, crazy knife-wielding women, radio frequency interference, and large electrical shocks, right?

Well, this won't help with the electrical shocks, but it's mighty uncomfortable anyway: Chainmail for your penis. When you think about how precious your little buddy is, how can you not spend a mere $75 to protect it?

I promise that my next post will be serious.